Grief
by Nixi Kami
Summary: What happened to invoke the grief Hermione felt so strongly in Serenitas? A brief flashback, part of the Willow Warriors series.


_A/N: I originally wasn't going to continue this, but after yet another night of insomnia I figured it's worth a shot. This is an AU fic in case you missed it. Thanks to Mags, as always._

 _Warnings: AU, Death (implied), Rape (implied), other implied war actions_

 **Disclaimer: The Harry Potter world is Rowling's, I just play in the sandbox.**

 **Hogwarts Castle, Winter 1995**

 _Excerpt from Hermione's Journal_

 _Most people would think an intellect like me would never be friends with Luna 'Looney' Lovegood, but I for one, find her perplexities endearing. Why, I remember the first time we met in the library. Madame Pince nearly kicked me out that day—me, of all people! Though I do suppose we got a bit heated, arguing over the existence of those creatures Luna was going on about. After that first meeting, we did not see each other for several weeks. Then, one day, she approached my study table and asked if I would be willing to help her with a potion's assignment._

 _I will admit it took most of my willpower to stay focused on the assignment and tutoring her. She has this tendency to sidetrack onto the most fanciful of subjects; a habit I have picked up from her, I am afraid. It took a few hours, true, with the tangents about the differences between pixies and fairies and whatnot, but we successfully managed to work together. I suppose it was a quite a sight for the few Ravenclaws that noticed our interaction, but I paid it no mind. I did not realize our study session and the subsequent ones to follow would make such a difference in her world until a few months ago._

 _Evidently, for those first few weeks of her initial year at Hogwarts, the older Ravenclaws bullied her something fierce. I only wish I had known and intentionally took her under my wing, instead of accidentally doing so. Harry and Ron were oh so surprised when I suggested inviting her to our defense sessions, having only met her once before in fourth year. Once I explained that she was the inspiration for the defense association—really, I cannot believe the boys wanted to call it "Dumbledore's Army"—and how instrumental she was in the research for the contract, they agreed she would be a marvelous additional._

 _Indeed, her skill in potions and defense are far above the average fourth year. I only have myself to blame for the fact, not that I would regret it. Luna assisted with brewing the Polyjuice Potion in second year and mastered the Patronus charm the first meeting it was covered._

 _Ah, there is the sidetracking I mentioned prior; I have rambled far enough today and I really should get down to breakfast with Luna and her father. I still cannot believe I managed to avoid Grimmauld Place for the winter holiday. Luna and her uncanny sense for knowing when I need an escape…_

"Hello, Hermione. Are the Blibbering Humdingers leaving you alone this morning?" asked Luna as Hermione walked into the kitchen. Hermione smiled, knowing Luna was asking if she had received any word from the boys; humdinger, after all, meant 'something impressive or exciting' and blibbering was her friend's polite way of calling Harry and Ron crybabies for their constant whining about Snape and the Slytherins.

"No sight of the humdingers yet, Luna, and might I say, those pancakes smell positively delicious." Hermione sat down at the breakfast nook after pouring a cup of tea from the kettle as she watched Luna make pancakes.

Luna laughed as she flipped the pan and responded, "They should. I have used this recipe since I was a child. Mom used to make apple pancakes for me every morning. The Prophet should be arriving soon, do you mind if I have the crossword puzzle first?"

"I never mind, Luna, go right ahead."

Luna hummed as she expertly served a short stack with syrup on the side for her friend. "I have the strangest notion I might not finish the crossword today, Hermione. I think we should go for a walk in the orchard this morning instead of reading the paper."

"If you insist Luna, just let me finish these round slices of heaven. "

It did not take the two long to finish breakfast without interruption from Xeno (who was sleeping in, as per his normal habit) and clean up. As they were about to walk outside, Luna grabbed Hermione in a hug. "I never did thank you for tutoring me all these years, Hermione."

Hermione laughed as she playfully shoved Luna off.

"It was nothing and you know it Luna."

Luna smiled, suddenly sad for no reason, "It was and it meant a great deal to me, Hermione. I will meet you at the orchard in a few minutes. I forgot my Humdinger kit upstairs."

Hermione thought the sudden change of emotion odd, but made no remark and continued towards the orchard. It was not unusual for her odd friend to switch emotions frequently and the walk to the orchard would take at least fifteen minutes.

She was halfway to the orchard when she was suddenly knocked to the ground by a blast wave. The sound of the explosion registered a few moments after her rather painful impact into the dirt. Hermione groaned before realizing something was horribly wrong and rolled over.

From her position on the ground, she could see smoke rising and the glow of the Dark Mark in the sky. Fear clawed at her heart as she scrambled to her feet. Hermione barely registered the sounds of Apparition as she ran towards the Rookery. It did not occur to her to check for Death Eaters still in the area, so great was her fear for her friend.

Near the fire, Hermione fells to her knees in shock.

"Luna…"

Her parents raised Hermione a devout Christian, but attending Hogwarts for over four years had shaken her belief in the religion. Even so, she silently prayed her friend would be safe, that she got out before the attack, that Luna would not die in a fire like her mother several years prior.

Hermione's prayer went unanswered as, several hours later, Remus Lupin found her still kneeling on the ground near the smoldering remains of the Rookery.

"Tonks! I found her!"

Hermione continued to stare at the remains of the house in front of her. Of course, they would forget there were two other people at the Rookery this week. She knew the Order only cared about the 'Golden Trio'.

She did not notice when Lupin picked her up and apparated back to Grimmauld Place. Nor did she notice when he placed her on the couch and covered her with a blanket.

All she could feel was the grief at losing a friend.

All she could see were the flames consuming what remained of Luna's home.

All she could think was 'Why, why did she warn me but stayed behind?'

As her grief grew, so too did her determination.

Hermione rose from the couch the next morning with a steel glint in her eye. They would pay.

They would all pay.


End file.
